Saturday, March 12, 2011

Countdown

Whenever I have a large task at hand with deadline, I need to have a countdown device. Note the word, "need." Not "like" or "prefer." Need. For work, I plan out my entire semester in an Excel spreadsheet. The schedule for each course is combined in one master schedule, with monthly meeting dates highlighted. As time marches on, my schedule shrinks as I hide the passing weeks. Most of my coworkers are aware of my habit and will often ask me: "What week are we on?" and I'll reply, "Week five, only three more weeks until Spring Break." I've turned into a speaking clock.

Some (such as my darling husband) would argue that my hyper-scheduling is a manifestation of my desire for control. Sure, I'm a list-maker and planner. I will not disagree. However, my countdown also serves as a motivator. When faced with a dreary, soul-sucking task, such as grading research papers or cleaning out the refrigerator, I will visualize my next break, or better yet, my next trip. This is why on any given return flight home, I will start thinking of when I can sneak away again. Day hikes are nice, but longer trips are much better at subduing the "I-can't-not-bear-one-more-day-of-this" blues.

(I am certainly not implying that my job is more miserable than most. Rather, this tactic helps me with any monotonous aspect of my life.)

There are sometimes in life when the countdown tactic just doesn't work. In the Summer of 2009, my husband found out on a Sunday afternoon his boss was sending him to Madrid for two and a half weeks - leaving on Tuesday morning. He called me on noon at Monday to let me know that the company travel agent found a screaming deal, and bought a ticket for me. I literally had 24 hours to reschedule my life and pack for Spain. My countdown was boiled down to hours instead of weeks. Even without the long-term planning, it was a fabulous trip. It taught me to allow time for wandering, and that some of the best memories are made by having a long lunch in a restaurant not listed in any guidebook.

My constant planning also runs against the Buddhist thought of living in the present moment.* Can I really be present when I am so focused on the future? Maybe the everyday doldrums wouldn't seem so bad... Clearly this is something I have to work on.

The countdown is now 7 days until we leave for Istanbul. I do have some days planned. But there are some days that are open for suggestions and other ideas. I do not know how to count in Turkish, and have yet to buy a map. But that's ok. We'll figure it out.

Babysteps.

*I am not a expert in Buddhism. Rather I enjoy expanding my mind by looking at other religions and philosophies. 'Nuff said.

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